Zombies Protest Hospital Closing

Which makes sense, if you think about it.

Wait...no it doesn't. more

Pentagon: Zombie Pigs First, Then Hibernating Soldiers

As if the swine flu wasn't bad enough, we're working on putting pigs into suspended animation. For the record, that's a different division of the government entirely. We'll be the ones with the shotguns. more

Man in zombie mask robs liquor store

And THIS is why we're still in business. more

Zombie Arrested After Police Chase

Just doing our jobs, ma'am. more

The “Zombie Hour:” When a Bad Work Day Spills Over at Home

"One couple declared a “zombie hour” immediately after getting home from work, during which each partner consciously forgave the other any bad moods or thoughtless comments. This gave each partner time to decompress."

Sounds good, until you realize that there is no such thing as "zombie time." Zombie time never rests. It just moves really slowly. more

Zombie Research Society Says We're Unprepared

We disagree. more

Into the Zombie Underworld

The piece is a detailed look at the elaborate system of secret societies, ritual magic, and pharmacologically-induced human trafficking that is the Haitian zombie culture. Berlinski follows Madame Zicot, a woman trying to track down her zombified daughter, Nadathe, by navigating her way through the secret societies. It is gripping as an occult procedural, and heartbreaking as a story of real personal tragedy. more

Man Punches “Zombie” In Iowa Restaurant

Look, we're all glad that citizens are attempting to take on zombies by themselves, but leave the zombie slaying to the trained professionals. Yes, even the Zombie Rights Campaign. more

Oh great, now they're protesting...

You know the zombie apocalypse is right around the corner when they start protesting in the street. Fortunately, that just makes them easier to find. Deanimation squads en route now. more

Living Dead Zombies to Demand Universal Health Care

And this is what happens when zombies go to town halls. more

Attack of the Town Hall Zombies

Makes perfect sense to us: all this talk about death panels resulted in zombies. It's the only explanation for all the groaning. more

Kid Attacks Other Kids, Claims Zombiedom

Yeah, we don't believe him either. more

When Zombies Go Bad

And we don't mean in the, "don't not so fresh that you'd want to eat them" kind of way either. more

Zombie Neurobiology

Ever wonder how a zombie thinks? Trick question, they don't! But if they did, here's how it would work. more

Great, they're all in one place...

The UK is, for some reason, trying to top the previous record of 1,227 zombies in one place. Which is good for zombie hunters, cause now they're all in one place...more

Dead-on zombie costume gets man arrested

Let this be a lesson to all zombie hunters. If you're gonna kill zombies, don't do it wearing "all black, knee pads and a gas mask, and carrying what looked to be a machine gun." Dress in normal clothes and carry a bazooka. more

Calling the Cops on Zombies

At least now we know they'll actually do something about the guy gnawing on your head. more

Real Zombie Parasites

This is so nasty, we have difficulty writing about it. But the short of it is, these little buggers infect animals and then take over. In short: zombifying their prey. Be careful, you could be next...more

G4 Underground: Zombie Apocalypse

Even G4 is getting in on it.

Video Games - Game Cheats - G4 Underground

EU quarantines London in flu panic

Oh yeah baby, this is it, the big one. Stewart tried to warn us that Swine Flu created zombies and now we know it's true. Get your shotguns ready! more

The Last 100 Days

You thought we were kidding about the zombie swine flu. But John Stewart knows. Oh yes, he knows.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	M - Th 11p / 10c
The Last 100 Days
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The Zombie Apocalypse is Nigh

Or maybe it's the pig apocalypse. more

Zombie Tools

No, not tools used by zombies. Tools made to KILL ZOMBIES, duh! more

Halligan Bar: The Ultimate Zombie Killer

There's one weapon that's most referenced in the Zombie Survival Guide, and although Max Brooks didn't realize it at the time, he meant the Halligan Bar. Seriously. more

Zombie Sighting!

A Metairie resident is recovering after a stranger bit a chunk of flesh out of his arm and swallowed it Saturday afternoon. more