Conclusion
What really matters in life?
Is it grades? SAT scores? Class rank? What about appearance or popularity?
Later on in life, is it money? Stuff? Appearance again, or popularity?
Many people would say love. But what kind of love--romantic? Familial? Altruistic?
I think what really matters is wholeness.
Among all the creatures on this earth, humans have the longest defenseless childhood. Children's lives become a series of increasingly complex negotiations based on one question: How do I keep the outer protection I need while still protecting my inner self?
This question doesn't live in their conscious minds--if it did, it would drive them crazy. But if you carefully observe their behavior, you'll see how they instinctively move between placating others and asserting themselves.
For children with ADD, this balancing act becomes even more difficult. Because they're disruptive, they're quickly surrounded by adults who are determined to force them to change their behavior. And because these adults are far more interested in their own lives than in your child's, they're going to choose the quickest and easiest strategy--drugs.
I wrote this book because I want your child to have more choices. I want him to be able to make some of the important decisions in his life. And I want her to feel that she can get the outer protection she needs without abandoning her inner self.
As parents, you are your child's primary protection against the outside world. But you're also the most serious threat to his inner life, because he'll do whatever it takes to keep you from abandoning him.
So, please, be careful as you work with your child. In a family, love, of course, is what really matters. Your child needs to keep her inner self safe and well nourished, and she can do this only if she knows she can trust you.
Your love really can set your child free.
Conclusion
- Children's lives become a series of increasingly complex negotiations based on one question: How do I keep the outer protection I need while still protecting my inner self?
- As parents, you are your child's primary protection against the outside world.
- You're also the most serious threat to his inner life, because he'll do whatever it takes to keep you from abandoning him.
- Your child needs to know she can trust you.
- Your love really can set your child free.